chochiyo_sama

Odd dreams last night.

I don't know if I mentioned this in here before, but I am often a child in my dreams (I always say that my mental age is 12, though usually in my dreams I'm closer to ten). Well, last night I was about 12 in my dreams. And I had run away from home. I was in Freeborn, which is the tiny town where I first began to teach.

A younger girl--a lot younger, since she was much shorter than I--befriended me, despite the objections of her parents. Though the girl looked nothing like her, I *knew* the girl was Hannah--Kvetch's niece GG. Her parents didn't want her hanging around me because they thought I was a delinquent. Heh heh...probably true. But Hannah is a bigger delinquent than me!

We went to the school, which had been closed for some time (in real life as well). We found the door ajar, so of course we went in. The exterior of the school was as it really is, as was the view from the doorway, but that's where reality ended. In the dream, that school was HUGE. There was no one there but GG and myself, and we explored the building thoroughly. Everything was dingy and dusty and there was stuff everywhere--as if the place had been abandoned in the middle of the school day, with everyone leaving everything just where it lay.

GG, being insane, apparently, began to mess around with the chemicals in the science lab. I was worried about her either poisoning, burning, or blowing herself up, but she survived somehow. Heh heh.

There were so many classrooms, and they were filled with wonderful old bookshelves and things that I lusted for. I wished I could get them home somehow, as they would have been remarkable in my house.

In my dream, I had begun to regret having run away from home, and was wishing I could go back, but I didn't want to deal with the response of my "parents"--knowing they'd be furious and worried and that I'd have to explain why I left. (And, like in most dreams, I didn't have a clue why I'd left, so what could I say?)

At some point the dream locale changed, and I was in the driveway of my parents's old house. My REAL parents, that is, not my dream parents. GG and I were talking and her sister (an older sister in the dream, taller than me) was trying to get her to come home as her parents didn't want her hanging around me. I climbed into a car that was sitting there, and was talking to her through the window.

Suddenly a huge semi-type truck pulled into the driveway. It was like a stock hauling vehicle.

It was my dream "father." He had apparently learned where I was and came to get me immediately in the vehicle that he was in--the big stock hauling semi. Apparently, he was some sort of big rancher. In my mind, I knew that we had a lot of money, and that we had horses. No specific memories, just that knowledge.)

I had two feelings--one was relief that my runaway experience was finally over, and the OTHER was horror and the instant NEED to get away from there as fast as possible. I locked all the doors of the car I was sitting in and began trying to start the engine with the file attachment of a fingernail clipper. It took a while, but I eventually got the car to start.

GG was banging on the window--she wanted in the car and to go with me. Her sister was there, trying to stop her from doing so. I would have unlocked the door and let her in, but my "father" was out of his truck and approaching the car.

My dream "father" was nothing like my real father. I don't recall what he looked like, exactly, but I have the impression of a tall, slim, sandy-haired man. He was wearing jeans and a shirt with rolled up sleeves. He didn't seem furious, only determined to stop me from running away again.

The three of them were clustered around the car--and I wanted to get out of there. I put the car into gear and tried to back up so I could get out of the drive way. GG had such a look of betrayal on her face--because I didn't open the door for her--but if I had, my dream "father" would have been around the car and in the door in a second, and my attempt to flee would have been stymied.

My feet wouldn't quite reach the gas pedal, so I had to slide down in the seat to hit it. The car jerked back and all of them leaped out of the way. I could see my "father's" face in the rear view mirror, looking sad and grim at the same time.

Funny. He never said a word.

It was at that point that I woke up.

It was so odd, though, the feeling that I had in the dream. The WANTING to be stopped and taken home because being on my own in the cold cruel world wasn't that much fun AND the HORROR at the idea of it happening. And the NEED to run run run away.

My dream self is an indecisive brat, apparently.