chochiyo_sama

I got up fairly early this morning--it was about 9:30, I suppose. I ate saltines and peanut butter in my room for breakfast. I cleared out a bunch of stuff that had accumulated next to my bed and got most of it put away. I had three or four Walmart bags full of random stuff sitting on the south side of my bed, and I went through all that and got most of it put away.

I had a bunch of empty hanging file folders and some manilla folders--some with stuff in them, some without--and I put those all away. I did not finish my laundry as I had planned. I still need to wash two loads of laundry and my white fuzzy blanket. I'm hoping I can do that tomorrow before I go to see my therapist.

Mom and I had some corned beef hot dish for lunch. It was pretty good. After lunch, I got into an old Mickey Rooney movie on TMC--A Yank at Eton. I like those old movies.

When it was over, I went back to the lair to continue to work on stuff. I put all my food supplies into the pink sterlight file box I had bought at Walmart last week. Things will be less messy that way.

I sacked up a bunch of garbage and bagged up all the empty Walmart bags to take to my car the next time I go out.

Jack and Cora stopped by in the late afternoon. I was trying to catch up with my scrabble games when Cora came larking down to see me. I teased her and asked her if she was skipping school to see me. "School is already over," she said.

Then I asked her if she had gotten kicked out of school for biting her teacher, and she looked at me with this blank face. LOL.

Then she told me today was "mismatch" day and she had gone to school with everything clashing. She had on two different socks and two different pairs of shoes. She is excited about pajama day which is either tomorrow or Wednesday--she plans to wear her spiderman pjs. LOL. She's really into the whole "homecoming week" festivities.

When I asked her why she was here, she said, "I came to torment you." LOL. That kid. She thought we should bake something, but I said no, it was too late to bake anything now. We'll probably bake again next weekend.

I hung out with her and helped her with the puzzles she was putting together while Jack set mom's old Packard Bell up in the porch and set her new machine that copies records onto dvds in the bedroom. It is a nice looking machine.

At seven pm, I came downstairs to watch the first episode of Terra Nova. It might be good. I have a feeling they are going to try to make it too much like Lost. I thought they moved the plot along much too quickly. They should have let more hints drop over the first few episodes and then reveal things like the "sixers"--the enemy group that had split off from the Terra Nova group.

At any rate, I am going to give it a chance and hope that it doesn't disappoint me.

I had a couple of toaster strudels for supper. Not very satisfying, I'm afraid.

Tomorrow I have to go to Rochester. I have an appointment to see my therapist.

It was a gray, gloomy, cold day. It literally felt like winter was breathing down the backs of our necks. Bleah. I am not ready for winter.

Current Mood: brain dead
Current Location: Lair
Current Music: furnace clicking

I woke up this morning to Cora pounding on my bedroom door. I ignored her, hoping she would go away and let me sleep a little longer. That child must have her picture in the dictionary next to the word "tenacious." When the knocking alone wasn't sufficient, she began yowling, "Aunt Cheryl? Aunt Cheryl! Aunt Cheryl? Aunt Cheeeerrrryllllll." Finally I responded since it was obvious she was not going to give up.

She waltzed in, saying, "Why are you still sleeping? It's in the nines."

I told her I was tired and I would get up in an hour or so. Not the answer she wanted, so she continued to bug me until I told her I would get up if she would go and get me a diet coke. Then I tried to get her to go bother Grandma for a while and give me fifteen minutes to get my teeth brushed and get dressed.

No way. She followed me to the bathroom, jabbering away the whole while, and stood in the doorway watching me pee and then brush my teeth. I said, "Why don't you go ask Grandma what we should bake, and I will get dressed while you are gone." The reason she was pestering me so vigorously is that she and I have baked every Saturday for the last three weeks, and she wanted to bake again today.

"I've seen my mom naked before," she said as I gathered up clothes to put on. "Naked people are gross," she went on to say. Yet, her big blue eyes remained solemnly fixed on me as she talked on and on about my cats, her cats, how diet coke is bad for you, especially if you drink it right away in the morning (I had demanded a can of diet coke if I was going to get up), football (and how it sucks), school (and how it doesn't suck), bacon (how delicious it is), and so on and so on.

At some point, Mom came in, and I had an audience of two while I got dressed. I felt like a goldfish in a bowl. LOL. A naked goldfish (although I was never actually naked).

So, anyhow.

I told Cora we had to finish Grandma's race car first. (Mom's church is having some sort of thing where everyone in the congregation has to decorate these little wooden cars and then they are going to have a pot luck and race them. Mom thinks it is a kind of dumb idea--so does Jack. I think it isn't a very churchy thing. It's more like something someone would do at some sort of a club, like boy scouts or something.

Anyhow, Cora painted the car blue last night, and today I made two tiny little license plates for the front and back of the car which say "ANGEL." I used clear red push pins for tail lights and tiny yellow buttons (the ones I use for my doll clothes) as head lights. I painted the windshield and the rear window on the car with white paint tinted slightly with blue. Finally, I glued a wing on each side of the car and a beautiful cross down the back where the "trunk" would be. When Jack came to pick up Cora last night, he put the tires on. I was afraid to do it, since Mom was told the wheels were very easily broken.

I am hoping I can get a picture of it before mom goes to church. I am quite please withthe way it turned out.

Cora wanted to go to the Ellendale Cafe for lunch, but it is closed on Saturday. She wanted bacon, so I said we would go to Perkins if Grandma wanted to. We then called Kim and asked her if she would like to join us, and she was very happy to do so. After we had already made arrangements with Kim, Cora decided she would rather go to McDonalds. Well, I had already called Kim. So we discussed it and decided that Cora could eat some bacon at Perkins with the rest of us, and on the way home we would stop at McDonalds and get her a happy meal.

Mom and Kim had burgers, and I had eggs and bacon because I planned to let Cora have my bacon. I had my eggs over easy and got toast instead of pancakes because I like to dip the toast in the soft eggs. Cora, the little booger, only ate three pieces of her bacon because she didn't want to be too full to eat her McDonalds. Kim bought a french silk pie to take home to her and Lucas. Yum. One of these days I am going to buy a slice of pie again.

We had fun there, laughing and talking. The food was good and hot. Kim wants to make a day of it next Saturday and everyone get their toes done then go to lunch or something. Cora was really excited about that because she LOVES to have her toes done.

After that, we went through the drive through at McDonalds. What a crazy order we gave the guy! One girl's happy meal with just a hamburger on a bun--no condiments of any kind, two twist cones (for me and mom), one plain cone (for Cora) and one sweet tea (for Kim). LOL.

Cora was then content and sat in the back seat happily chowing down her fries as we dropped off Kimbies and headed home.

Mom and I were really tired when we got home, and Cora was raring to go and bake something. I told her I needed to rest a bit and spend some time with my kitties. So, I went to the Lair and snuggled the kitties. Mom fell asleep in her recliner upstairs, and Cora put together her puzzles. I suppose she allowed me about an hour of rest before she was down here bugging me to bake. I didn't really feel like baking, but that child is relentless.

So, I found a recipe for apple cookies on line and we baked them. At first I was disappointed, but after I put the powdered sugar glaze on them, I found them okay. The apple cake we made last week was much better with its caramel glaze.

Jack called and said he was coming to pick up Cora, but Cora resisted, saying she was not ready to come home yet. So, he gave her until 7:30, which she still protested, saying she wanted to stay overnight. LOL. I think she would move in if she could.

She seems very happy and content here. And she is fun to have around. She chatters incessantly and makes all sorts of interesting observations about everything.

Jack took the time to put the wheels on mom's little car for her.

Mom and I watched a little TV and then went to our separate floors and cashed in our chips for the night.

Current Mood: okay
Current Location: Lair
Current Music: train rattling by

I slept so well last night that I could hardly believe it. I guess taking care of Cora was either so relaxing that it helped me sleep well, or so challenging that I slept the sleep of exhaustion. LOL.

Not much went on today. DeAnn and I had spoken of getting together, but my cell phone fell out of my pocket at Jack's house and I didn't realize it. I looked all over my room and tried to call several times. but I heard nothing. Then they called and said they had found it this morning. It speaks to how tired I was last night. Usually I check to make sure it is in my pocket before I leave.

Jack and Caleb brought it back this afternoon.

Mom went to church this morning, and while she was gone, I had a hot, relaxing bath. I brought my clothes upstairs and changed in the spare room afterwards. Mom made spaghetti for lunch. It was okay. Not as good as mine, but good enough. I was going to make spaghetti yesterday, but I didn't get it done.

DeAnn had tried to call twice while my phone was at Jack's, and then she gave up. I called her when I got my phone back but it was already after 3 pm, too late for us to get together and do anything. She had homework to do, and it was gloomy and crappy outside. We set a date for brunch next Friday. That will be good. I like going out for breakfast.

So, I didn't get out of the house again today. Tomorrow Mom goes to help LaVonna can pears. I could slip off to Owatonna while she is gone, but I will be taking her into Albert Lea Tuesday, so it's kind of pointless to go off tomorrow. I need to think about what I need anyhow. Plus, I haven't accomplished any of my own stuff for the last two days. I need to just work on a few of my own issues tomorrow. I might run down to Lerbergs for a box of crackers to stow in my room for nights like tonight when there is no supper. I managed by eating spoonfuls of peanut butter out of the jar with a plastic spoon. I really wish there was a place for my little fridge. Of course, it is too late for that anyhow as I gave it to Shane. Sigh.

One of the things that Cora said to me yesterday was "You have too much stuff." She is only seven and doesn't realize my situation, but she is certainly quoting either my mother or hers. It may be a lot of stuff for one room, but it is all I have left from a two story house! I don't think I have excessive possessions right now.

This afternoon I did a little research on line and lifted a variety of pictures from a Tammy collector's site. She had pictures of a lot of the outfits IDEAL had marketed for the Tammy family. I thought I might print them off and try to duplicate some of them. I don't know why I am suddenly enamoured of this doll family. Probably because they are so different from everything else I have and they look so scruffy and neglected. I had seriously thought of getting rid of them before, but Tammy is my childhood doll, and the poor thing has had no other of her kind for too many years. There are only five of them. I think it is reasonable to keep them.

Later I went up with my sewing box and sat in the recliner upstairs. Mom had the gas fireplace going and it was very cozy. I sewed for a while, but I came to the point where I needed to do the facing, and I had forgotten the fabric for that downstairs. So, I laid back in the recliner and had a little snooze. Mom was watching football, and I hate football. When I woke up, football was over, and she was sort of watching the Emmys which I also hate. She was bored with it, so she turned on Auction Hunters, which we both enjoy. There was an episode on tonight that I had never seen before--they found a bumper car in one of the storage lockers. It was pretty cool--from the early 1950s.

That's about it for me today. Tomorrow I want to clean the cat area and make sure they have plenty of food and water. Then I will probably scrub up the Tammy doll family and remove their clothing for repair and laundering. I have a couple of bags of stuff to be filed. I have to fill out my unemployment claim for this week. I need to try again to get ahold of Greg Klevos, and I have to contact Amy to tell her to get the mail. I also need to get the ball rolling in having all the bills put into THEIR name. I worry about this situation.

I don't know why my life has to be so fucking hard. I wish I could just go into suspended animation until my four years to Rule of 90 is up. Of course, my cats would have to go in with me because I wouldn't want to abandon them for four years.

It's been in the 50s for the last couple of days, and it feels like winter is coming quickly. It is already the middle of September which is quite a shock. I'm tired, so I guess I will try to go to sleep now.

Current Mood: sleepy
Current Location: Lair
Current Music: snoring cats.

I was up past three again last night. I just can't get to sleep at a decent hour. I am almost always in bed by 10 pm, but the moment I lay down--BANG! All notion of sleep leaves me.

Today, I had to babysit Cora while Kari and Jack went to Caleb's football game. She arrived here at about 9 am. I was awake, but still in my pjs when she got here. She hung out in my room and talked to me for a long time. Then I sent her up to Mom so that I could get dressed. She was very excited about baking. We have become baking buddies. LOL. She told Mom, "I love to bake!"

Mom went to Harmony today to visit the Amish community with her church group. She was afraid she would get back after dark, so I drove her to the church and dropped her off at about 9:45. Cora elected to stay here by herself while I took Mom to the church. She was playing an odd little game with all Mom's beanie babies. She had bears set up all over the living room. She talked and sang and played with those critters completely without self-consciousness. I was very amused by it all. "Bearathon" was the name of the "town" she had set up, and there were creatures in "Heaven" (the shelf above the fireplace) who watched over the creatures down below. She has a very creative little mind.

I tried to grab a little nap while she was playing, but she kept noticing my eyes were shut and telling me, "You are NOT ALLOWED to go to sleep, Auntie Cheryl. We have to BAKE today."

So, even though I didn't feel much like it at the time, I got out the stuff and we made a double batch of chocolate chip cookies, a batch of peanut butter cookies, and a raw apple cake with a caramel glaze. Everything turned out very good. She was very into measuring the ingredients. I had fun working with her. She had so many questions, like "Why do we need to put in Crisco?" and "What does flour do for the cake?"

When Kari and Jack got back from the football field, Kari called and wanted to know if Cora was ready to come home and go shopping in Owatonna. Cora immediately replied, "No. I want to stay with Aunt Cheryl." I was really hoping for a little quiet time in the house with mom gone, but it was not to be. Cora was here from 9 in the morning till 5:30 pm. We had a very nice time together, though. I don't regret losing out on the time by myself.

She took a couple of breaks from baking with me to read her book Junkyard Dog or play with the Beanie Babies. She didn't really enjoy putting the cookies on the cookie sheet. She also watched a couple of kids shows on TV. One was I, Carly, and another was SpongeBob Square Pants.

Kari and Jack called and wanted to invite me and Mom over for Papa Murphy's pizza and to watch the movie Thor, which they just picked up today. I didn't expect Mom back till 7 or 8 pm. But to my surprise she got here before Kari and Jack did. Fortunately, I had already done the dishes, wiped down the table, counters and stove, ad swept before she got here. I had split the apple cake batter into two small square cake pans, and both baked up nicely. They came out of the oven shortly after Mom came home. I was making the caramel glaze when Kari and Jack and Caleb got there.

They headed home after Jack hauled my kitty litter out to the garbage and Cora got her messes cleaned up. Mom and I followed shortly afterwards with one of the two cakes I had made. We had Papa Murphy's pizza--one was pepperoni and cheese with garlic sauce on one half and regular tomato sauce on the other. They also got a thin crust veggie delight for me. I prefer vegetables and no meet on my pizza,

Thor was just as good the second time through. The actor that plays Thor could eat crackers in my bed any time he wanted to! There were a lot of small, clever, cute things in the movie. For example, the point where Thor is all cocky, saying, "You DARE threaten THOR, the god of thunder with that puny...." Then the chick tazes him and he falls twitching to the floor. LOL. Then in the hospital, when he's yelling to all the doctors and orderlies that are trying to subdue him, "You are no match for THOR..." And one of them shoves a needle in his ass and puts him down. LOL.

Mojo, the new kitten let me hold him for quite a while. He is a big flirt and adorable. He purred and purred and purred. He made me miss the kitten stage...but I still remember the curtain climbing. I don't want to go through THAT again. LOL.

Kari and Jack brought me back a baggie of Bing cherries as a "thank you" for taking care of Cora. She was no bother. She's a pretty good girl, even if she did lecture me on the evils of drinking Diet Coke. LOL.

That's about it for me, I guess.

Current Mood: worn out.
Current Location: Lair
Current Music: Absolutely nothing

The very affectionate nature of my cat, who insisted that his very ability to continue living depended on my turning off the computer and cuddling him, caused me to fail to post yesterday. There wasn't a whole lot to say, anyhow...

Monday--

Got up early. Mom was already washing her living room windows when I went upstairs. She is insane about her windows. She must wash them a dozen or more times a year. Mine were never washed the entire time I lived in my house.

I made poached eggs for us for breakfast. We also had toast and grapefruit. Then I went down to the Lair and worked on some stuff. I'm trying to find places for the last of my stuff. Mom came down later with my debit card for my unemployment. I activated it and asked her if she'd like to run into Owatonna with me later. (I knew she wouldn't want to miss her soap opera).

So, we drove to Owatonna and went to Walmart where I got two bags of cat food, another container of litter box deodorizer, and an air freshener to put in the furnace room near the litter boxes. I also bought 2 boxes of generic Nutty Bars, some apples, a case of diet coke, a carton of laundry detergeant which was on sale, a jar of peanut butter, since I heard that peanut butter is going to become insanely expensive in the near future, and two cute little outfits for my niece which were on sale for $3 each.

After Walmart, we went through the drive through of McDonalds for a twist cone. We stopped at Kentucky Fried Chicken and bought the eight piece meal package, all dark meat. We had that when we got home--it was good. I prefer the roasted chicken, but mom likes the original recipe, so that's what we got. I paid for it as Mom had bought my meals at least three or four times while I was poverty stricken.

That was our very late lunch--and we had no supper.

We watched TV for a while, though I don't remember what we watched. I wasn't paying much attention. I was working on the cute little outfit I was making for the Chryssie doll. I have to upload these pictures to Flickr so I can put some of them on here.

Mom had Bible study at 6:30 pm. After she left, I went into my Lair and read for a while. I finished reading The Rowan by Anne McCaffrey. It was okay. Her heroines are always these teeny tiny but fiesty little things and the heroes are always these huge, muscle-bound guys with square jaws and hard eyes that only turn tender for the sweet little chick heroine. It gets old.

I tried to play scrabble on line, but the damned website was not behaving well. I chatted with my former student, Bill Wilson, who told me that he had survived cancer four times and was now fighting it for a fifth time. Then he told me it was a brain cancer and that he had been given 8-14 months to live.  He assured me he intended to beat it again...I hope he can. I suppose he is in his early thirties now. He was always a good kid.

That was depressing.

Tuesday

I woke up today and had a Nutty Bar for breakfast here in my lair. I sure wish I had my little fridge down here because then I could keep milk right in my room and have cereal every morning. I took my meds then started working on my laundry. I had three loads. The last one is in the dryer now. I'll fold it in the morning.

I also cleaned the litterboxes, gave my cats fresh food and water, and put the air freshener out there.

I put away a bunch of books that had been in Walmart bags and worked on the Lair most of the morning.

Mom and I had Kentucky Fried chicken left overs for lunch. Then she came downstairs and we watched a bunch of judge shows while I finished the little outfit I had been working on yesterday. We had hot green tea and some cookies while we watched TV.

Cora came over at about 5:30 as Caleb had a football game and she doesn't enjoy going to the games. She gets bored. I gave her the two little outfits I had bought her and she liked both of them. She sat on Grandma's lap for a long time, reading her book and trying to persuade Mom to take her home so she could ride her bike and Mom could watch her. LOL.

At 7 pm, she and Mom went upstairs to watch Wipeout, which I do not enjoy because I think it is stupid and pointless. I stayed downstairs and watched NCIS. Jack and Kari and Caleb came to get her around 8 pm. They hung out very briefly as it is a school night and the kids had homework to do before bed.

I had begun sewing the little black silky "witch" costume for the Chryssie doll. It is completely done except for the hem and being sewn up the back. I think it is too short, and I am going to add a ruffle to the bottom of the dress to make it longer. I may make it a double ruffle, with the underneath one being made of that black fabric with the holographic silver stars on it. I am planning on making her a cloak out of that as well.  I saw a very cute pair of boots on EBAY for her, and I am tempted to get them for her. I have a $70 credit on my Target card...

My little Stewie Bug is being a big cuddle-bug tonight. He is pressed up as tight as he can get to my stomach. I have to stop typing from time to time to pet him and tell him he is Momma's precious baby boy....yes he is! Yes he is! LOL.

That's about it. Tomorrow, I may sneak out to Owatonna while mom is at bible study--need to get my license tabs and also would like to get some of the stuff she would not approve of--like chocolate candy. Also, I have sugar cookies to deliver to my nephew Erik and some books for my sister Joni. Another thing I hope to do tomorrow is to wash my bedding and vacuum the lair.

Current Mood: blah
Current Location: Lair o' Despair
Current Music: nada

I woke up earlier than usual today as I wanted to watch three episodes of A Haunting on the Discovery Channel. I brought my sewing box out with me so I would not be just idling time watching that show, but it turned out that I had seen all three episodes before--more than once for each one. It was disappointing.

I fell asleep in the recliner during the first episode and woke up at around 10 am. I sewed a little bit, then fell asleep again and did not wake up until after noon. Mom made a moderately disparaging comment at that point, saying, "I don't know how you can sleep so much. I would be so grogging."

I said, "I think it is a defense mechanism. My mind does not want to deal with the situation I find myself in (unemployed, homeless, all my stuff either gone or shoved into a shed or stuffed into a room), so it makes me unconscious. When I am asleep I am not sad or depressed. I am not worried about money or how I will get to my rule of 90 or anything. I do not miss my students or my job when I am unconscious. So, I am happiest when I am feeling nothing at all."

She backed off then, as I think she really does understand how absolutely awful my life is to me right now.

Shortly after that, Bonnie, my therapist, called to set up an appointment with me for next Friday at 10 am. She asked me how I was doing and I told her that all I wanted to do was sleep. She made a sad noise, but told me not to worry about it too much right now--it was a very normal way of dealing with a personal disaster. She did also say that it cannot go on and on--but I think it is just that this is the first week of school with kids--and I am not there.

I passed on her remarks to my mom, who just accepted them--I think she IS trying.

Caleb rode his bike over here early in the afternoon and hung out most of the day. Kari and Cora came over around 3 pm to get the boxes of stuff that are going to the consignment shop. Cora decided to stay too. Mom had asked me if I would make a "cheesecake" as her cousins were coming over late this afternoon. I said sure.

This is not actually a cheesecake. It is a family dessert that is very simple to make and delicious. We have called it cheesecake for as long as I can remember. Finding out what cheesecake really was shocked me. I liked it, but I think I like our cheap family facsimile of it better.

It is very easy to make...

First, you melt a stick and a half of butter and combine it with a box of graham cracker crumbs and a tablespoon of sugar. Then, you pat a little over half of the crumbs in the bottom of a 9x12" cake pan. I usually rub the bottom and sides of the pan with one of the butter wrappers, just to make the crust easier to scoop out later. This is set aside.

Next, you take a package of jello--flavor of your choice--and dissolve it in a cup of boiling water. Stir it up till it is completely dissolved, then put that in the refrigerator to cool and jell.

In another bowl, combine a softened package of cream cheese, a cup of sugar, and a tsp of vanilla. Stir it up well. Set aside.

Now, you pour a can of very cold condensed milk into a mixing bowl and beat it until it is thick sort of stiff. It helps if you put the bowl and the beaters in the freezer for a while before this stage.

Combine the jello, cool and jelled, with the cream cheese mixture. Mix well.

Add this to the whipped condensed milk and stir until thoroughly combined. Pour this into the prepared crust.

Sprinkle the rest of the graham cracker crumb mixture onto the top of the dessert and place it in the refrigerator until it "sets."

It is delicious. You can make it "light" too, by using sugar free jello, low-fat cream cheese, and skim condensed milk. It tastes just as good as the regular, in my opinion.

Anyhow, Cora wanted to help me make the cheesecake, so I let her stir the jello into the hot water until it was dissolved. Then I let her stir the graham cracker crumb mixture and pat it into the cake pan. She was so serious about the whole thing. :)

I started the cream cheese and sugar because it is kind of hard to stir in the beginning. She held the spoon and I poured in the vanilla. Then I let her stir. She loved the taste of this mixture. I think she probably ate 1/3 cup of it. LOL.

I had to operate the hand mixer because it was just too heavy for her little hands.

She spread the crumbs on top with soooo much care.

Then we stuck it in the fridge and waited for it to chill.

I took a couple of pictures of her helping--but I haven't downloaded them from my camera yet.

Then I was forced to watch several episodes of Spongebob Squarepants. Ugh. After a while, she wanted some food, so I made her a peanut butter sandwich--no butter, crusts cut off. I ate the crusts. LOL. Waste not...

While she was eating her peanutbutter sandwich a damned little gnat landed on it, so she wouldn't eat any more of it.

Mom cut us each a piece of the cheesecake so she could taste it, but she didn't eat a bit of it. She didn't like the looks of it.

I was supposed to take her home at 6:30, but we didn't get out of the house until 6:45. So, she took her piece of cheesecake home for her momma.

Ingrid had texted me earlier, and I told her I would call her after I took my niece home. So, I sat in my mom's driveway and talked to her for a few minutes. She's been having a rocky week, taking care of her grandson quite a bit. Now, she is taking care of Nicky's dog.

Mom's cousins did not show up until well after 7 pm, but they had a nice visit. I had intended to be down in my lair before they got here, but I didn't get out fast enough. I didn't want to seem rude, running out of the room when they came in, but we had a nice chat. Lily and Jerry stopped in later for a cup of coffee and a piece of dessert. They all loved the dessert. I texted Kari to tell Cora that they all thanked her and said it was delicious. Cora giggled at the news.

Lily had some bad news from the Clinic. Apparently she has two tumors on her pancreas. She has to go in on Monday for a CT scan. I hope they are either benign or else that they are not tumors at all but some other little cyst or something.

Pancreatic cancer is a real nasty kind.

On a happier note, even though Franklin managed to pull his feeding tube out, he has been continuing to improve. He is eating a lot, able to defecate regularly, and is playful and loving.

Lily felt pretty bad about what the doctors had told her last night, and when Jerry woke up in the night, he discovered Franklin was cuddled next to Lily's torso, as snug and tight as he could get with his little head resting on her shoulder. Cats know and cats care when their master is upset.

Dogs do too. Animals are so much better than people.

Mom is going to the fair with Lily and Jerry tomorrow morning around 8:30. I want to get up and take a bath tomorrow morning, then run into Walmart in Owatonna to pick up some cat food, diet coke, and bottled water. I will probably add a little something to my chocolate stash as well, just to be sure I do not run out.

I emptied a large copy paper box today which contained my Barbie Bazaar magazines and some Nutshell News magazines. I don't care so much about the Nutshell News, but I do not want anything to happen to my Barbie Bazaars. I found some more fabric and a few more doll clothes that were already cut out but not fully sewn together--or even sewn together at all.

That's something I will have to work at. I hate half-finished projects everywhere.

That's it for me today--maybe some pictures tomorrow.

Current Mood: sleepy
Current Location: bedroom
Current Music: nothing much.

I've been busy--primarily because last week was midquarter--midquarter of THIRD QUARTER. It is incredibly hard to believe that the school year has been whizzing by so quickly.

I am losing too many good and fun kids to adulthood this year. Time needs to slow down. I'm not finished enjoying their presence yet.

Not even close.

:(

Anyhow--

Last week is pretty much a blur in my mind right now. It was stressful as so many kids have just blown off three weeks worth of work in my Music as Lit class--Their assignment was simple and (I think) really fun.

Choose a song you like.
Get a copy of the lyrics.
"Analyze" the lyrics (ie Write a short paper explaining what they mean to you. Include a paragraph telling why this song appeals to you. Give a little background on the artist who performs the song.
Put together a digital slide show OR a poster board containing images that illustrate the meaning of this song. (Your own interpretation.)
Play the song for the class.
Present your slide show or poster to the class and share your analysis and what you learned about the artist.

They had three weeks to do this. Three freaking weeks. The kids who got to work on it right away had it done in three days. And they really enjoyed the activity.

sigh.

I get frustrated when people just don't make an effort.

Hopefully this week will be better.

Anyhow--enough bitching.

On Friday, i managed to get most of my correcting done before I went home. I rode with Susan, so I just chilled on the way home. It came to my attention that Gran Torino was playing in Kasson. I have wanted to see that movie since it came out.

Susan dropped me off in my driveway at 3:30 pm. The movie started at 4 pm. I didn't have enough cash on me, and going into the house to fetch some cash would have made me late for the movie.  I did have a $19 check from mom in my billfold, so I went through the drive through of the bank and cashed it. Then I headed to Kasson. I made it right at 4 pm, and was happy to find a parking spot right across the street. i dashed in, bought my ticket, some popcorn, and a bottle of water. The theater was packed,and I had to sit in a 4-seat row with two other people.  I felt uncomfortable. I prefer a wide berth.

Anyhow, the movie was excellent. It was surprisingly both tender and sad. (In addition to being a racial slur fest of epic proportions. However, the purpose of that was to show Walt's evolution from an ethnocentric grumpy pants to a more culturally aware not-so-grumpy pants.) A lot of people left the theater sniffling when it was over.

His relationship with his sons made me feel sad. It reminded me of how my own father just didn't really connect with us kids. I feel like I hardly knew the real him. around us, he was completely absorbed in his TV sports events. There were very few times when he actually just sat and visited with us about life. Maybe he just didn't know how.

God knows his own parents were pathetic and useless. It's no wonder he had such poor parenting skills himself.

Ah, well.

When I came out of the theater, I discovered that I had parked in a very poorly marked handicapped space. I about peed my pants. but there was no ticket on my windshield, so I guess I dodged the bullet. There was no sign in front of the spot, and the icon on the road was all covered with slush and ice. I could just barely see a little piece of it sticking out from under the snow when I pulled out.

So, that was a little scary.

When I got home, I heated up my left over beans and hot dogs then went upstairs and called my mom. I was going to have a short nap, then get up and clean the bathroom and pick up the big pile of crap that had formed next to my bed.

Well, I woke up from my "nap" at 3:30 am. So, I put on my pjs, turned off the lights, and went back to sleep. when I awoke in the morning, I cleaned the toilet and the sink, sacked up a lot of upstairs garbage, and cleaned out the mess next to my bed. Then I sorted out some fabric I wanted to bring home to mom's as she had volunteered to cut out some patterns for me.

When I had finished that, I went downstairs and packed my laundry in my big suitcase. Then I threw it into the car and headed for Ellendale. I made a stop at Starbucks for a green tea frappachino, which is one of my current obsessions. When I got to Ellendale, I made a stop at Lerbergs to pick up a couple of pounds of Hope butter. That is the very best butter ever made.

Mom and I just hung out on Saturday. We watched several episodes of Burn Notice. Later we watched Clean House. We had popcorn for lunch and she made a very tasty roast beef with potatoes, carrots, and cabbage in her crock pot. I sewed all day and she cut out doll clothes for me.

On Sunday, she made waffles for breakfast. This is solid evidence that mom is so thrilled to have me visiting. I have always been an enormous fan of waffles, and she has always said that they are too much work. she made me waffles for breakfast the last time I was home too. :)

We watched some Lifetime movie called "A Father for Brittany;" it was, of course, a real tear jerker which contained death, insensitive officials strangling the human heart with red tape, an adorable little Asian baby girl, and the evolution of Andrew McCarthy from a callow youth to a sure-enough, growed up man.

We met Jack and Kari and the kids at the Chinese restaurant in Owatonna (the one near Walmart). Cora ate a cup of chocolate pudding and Caleb ate some noodles. I don't think we should have had to pay for them.   Cora was a little shy and stand-offish at first, but i teased her about eating frog legs so she could jump really high. Then Caleb brought me a cream puff. I separated the top from the bottom and made it look like the cream puff was talking to her. Then I stuck a broken piece of fortune cookie into the top of it and made it say, "Look, I've got a hat. Do you like my hat? Hey! Hey, you! Do you like my hat?" She started giggling then. After that, I stuck a piece of fortune cookie in the center, so it stuck out like a tongue. That set her off again.

It was pretty amusing. She cannot resist me. Mwa ha ha.

Mom and I went home right after that (well, I took her to Target as she wanted some photo sticky tabs, but they were out of them). We watched a couple of Clean House episodes. I sewed, and she cut out some doll clothes patterns for me.

Poor mom's eyes are still not functioning like they should be, and that is very frustrating for her. She is hoping that her vision will improve more after she has her cataract surgury. I hope it does too. It breaks my heart to see her fretting about her vision.

Jack and Kari and the kids came over after a bit and we played a rousing game of Settlers of Katan. Though I was getting NOTHING in the beginning of the game, I somehow managed to win. whoo. My victory was only because I had good brick and wood numbers and could build a really long road. The "Longest Road" points were what allowed me the victory.

We just hung out and talked after that.  I didn't start for home until after 6 pm.

I stopped for a cheese burger at Burger King as I did not feel like cooking anything when I got home. Their medium drinks are enormous. I had to get up to pee like 5 times last night, and I only drank about half of it.

When I got home, I unpacked my suitcase and hauled the clean laundry upstairs. I didn't put it all away yet. I will do that when I get home tonight.    I filled my pill caddies and watched an episode of House. I turned on my computer, thinking I'd read some of my kids' creative writing journals, but I was so tired I couldn't keep my eyes open. I ended up sleeping from 8:30 til about 9:15, then I woke up, turned off the computer, and went to bed. i'd had enough for one day, I guess.

Current Mood: okay
Current Location: classroom
Current Music: kids doing their classmate interviews for senior sem.

Home again, Home again, splikkity lick!

I've been home long enough to feed the cat, haul my suitcase back upstairs, fill the cat's water bowl, strip off my clothing (I was hot), climb onto my bed and lounge here in my minimal nightwear, letting the air conditioning and the ceiling fan blow on me.

AHHHHH

BETTER.

I went through the Subway drive thru for a tuna sub. I got a 12" so I could have supper tonight and lunch tomorrow...then I went through the Starbucks drive though and got one of those strawberry and creme things....only I got it without the whipped cream. It was delightful. My whole face was numb with cold by the time I got home.

BRR

On the way home, I saw three interesting sights. I saw a great blue heron on the edge of the absolutely still swamp. The blue sky with its puffy white clouds was mirrored in the swamp. With the sun hitting on the high grass behind him, he stood out like a giant cutout on a marquee. He was beautiful and dark and mysterious looking.

On the other side of Owatonna, I saw a SNOW WHITE cat sitting on a field drive with the high corn rising up behind her. It was the most incredible shade of emerald green with the sun shining on it--and she was absolutely WHITE WHITE.

Then, just a little further down the road, an enormous coyote burst out of the cornfield and tore across the road full bore. It was as big as a german shepherd! The sun hit his side and turned him golden brown. He pelted into the ditch and disappeared into the shadows of a little wooded area.

I felt like I'd seen three major arcana cards played from the Tarot deck of mother nature!

All three of the images were striking--each made me feel almost spiritually touched. They were so sharp and intense.

I told James (Hierarchy) about this, and teased him that I felt like I'd tumbled into a Bob Dylan song and that perhaps I was THE CHOSEN ONE. Heheheeheheh

I saw James's new flash movie. Hysterically funny. Sick, twisted, crude, and Avalest as Usual, but hilarious.

Not much else is new.

Played with Cora a little today.

She'd creep up and grab the toe of my tennis shoe, and I'd howl, "OOWWWW!!!"

She'd giggle and back away. Then she'd creep back up and do it again.

Eventually, she'd stand right next to my foot, reach out to it without actually touching it, and wail, "OoooooOOoo"

It was so damn cute!

I love babies.

Current Mood: CHOSEN....heheheeheh

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