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Jun. 27th, 2011 11:03 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
chochiyo_sama
The days run together in my head.
If I don't post at least every third day or so, everything that is going on in my life sort of fades into fuzzy shadows.
On Wednesday, June 15, I had an appointment to meet with Jay at 10 am. I arrived almost on the dot, but he was in the office talking to Laurie. He said he would finish up with her and come down to my room "in a couple of minutes."
About an hour and a half later, he came down and basically confirmed my suspicions that I will be left to twist in the wind. If the board agrees, I will get insurance coverage--but that is a mighty BIG "if." I won't know until sometime in July when the board meets again. The conversation was basically that he was going to try to get the medical insurance for me--but that if "[I] wasn't prepared for retirement, that was on [me]."
So much for, "You aren't alone in this like you would have been at Triton. We'll be here for you, helping you every step of the way."
Both Jay and Susan want me to retire on disability. However, I fucking do not want to retire on disability. Immediately, I would become persona non grata. I would be nobody, allowed to do nothing. I'd just be sitting around waiting to die, basically. Fuck that. I am far too young and full of promise and ability to cash in my chips.
Jay rejected the idea of my being a para for 2 years and 37 days on the grounds that being a para was "bitch work" and why would I want to do "bitch work." Well, the obvious reason is that I could apply the PERA to my TRA and retire with a fully met rule of 90 pension with no penalties. Also, the school would get me and my 30 ytears of expertise and my excellent rapport with the kids for half of what they have been paying me. It sounded win-win to me, but Jay asked how he would explain it to Ryan who was cut as a para. I kind of think Ryan would be okay with me having the job--knowing my situation.
So, as usual, I am completely on my own, twisting in the wind--cheated out of the retirement I have worked so hard for--and not even a card of thanks or a shout out at graduation for best wishes in my uncertain future.
The funny thing is, I do not feel angry. I feel terribly, terribly hurt and cheated. I feel I deserved better than this. Much better. And I feel like no one really gives a shit. I felt like I was a bother and an annoyance while I was talking to Jay--like I should just let go of the last vestige of hope and just blow way in the breeze. Adios. And as soon as my dried up husk tumbled into a ditch, I would be forgotten entirely.
Such is my fate, I guess.
It makes me feel a little bitter. But sadly, not at all surprised.
It just kills me that I got SOOOO CLOSE to being able to retire legally and honorably and had it ripped out from under me without a second thought.
I had planned to see X-Men after seeing Jay, but since he was so late in meeting with me, it was too late to see the movie. I had an appointment with my therapist in the early afternoon. I discussed my conversation with Jay with her. It didn't help much.
The next day I had an appointment with my doctor. My blood sugar was still not great. My blood pressure was really good. She felt like I was in a much better place mentally than I had been the last time I saw her. She upped my diabetes med. Hopefully once the stress of moving and getting rid of all my stuff is done, I can focus on eating better and getting my health in order.
After I left her office, I drove to Rochester to see the X-Men, but the projector was broken, so I saw Super 8 instead. It was okay--but the monster was lame. The guy who played the dad was the guy from Early Edition, a series that was on a long time ago. I always liked him.
On Friday, I went to see Charlotte's Web at the Little Theatre of Owatonna. It was so cute. The spider costumes were awesome, and the baby spiders at the end were adorable.
DeAnn and I saw X-Men last week in Rochester. It was excellent--a very satisfying movie.
I have been to mom's two or three times with carloads of stuff. The last trip I brought two huge suitcases stuffed full of fabric along with two or three Walmart bags stuffed with fabric also. I also brought one of my desk chairs on wheels. The fabric is now in two totes and two laundry baskets in the closet. Next trip, I hope to bring some of my 3-drawer Sterlite containers so that I can organize it.
I sorted through all the fabric at home and put a bunch of it in white garbage bags to be gotten rid of. I have four white kitchen-sized garbage bags full of rejected fabric right now. I will probably have at least two more before I am done going through stuff.
Last Saturday, Ingrid and I went to see The Green Lantern. It was much better than I expected. We did not see it in 3-D.
Yesterday, Ingrid and her husband Jim had me over for lunch. New York strip, baked potatoes, zucchini and tomatoes and onions grilled in foil, and a cranberry vinigrette salad with spring greens. Everything was delicious. I played with their puppy Missy, a papillion until she collapsed in a heap of happy exhaustion. She is a cute little doggie.
Today, I felt groggy and out of sorts, so I slept in for a long, long time. I can't do this tomorrow as I have an appointment with my therapist at 1. I also have the stuff to make tator tot hot dish, so I'd like to get that done in the morning--perhaps bake some cookies as well. I'd also like to get the kitchen cleaned up--it's looking cluttered and grungy again. The living room and dining room could use a good vacuuming again as well.
I took some pictures of the way my underground lair is coming along. I ill put them in my next post if I can get Livejournal to cooperate with me.
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Jay is a shit.
Date: 2011-06-28 05:24 am (UTC)You had an appointment and he kept you waiting and hour and a half? Would he have done that to anyone else? Sorry, but I wouldn't have waited and I wouldn't have gone to a room that was no longer mine. I would have waited in his office and after 30 min. I would have excused myself to his secretary and left. Piss on his disrespect.
File for unemployment immediately. You are not going to let them tell you what do to or ruin the rest of your life. He does not control you and he does not decide. You do. It sounds a lot to me like Jay has discriminated against you by firing you because you are handicapped. THAT'S ILLEGAL. And if I were you, I'd mention that and say you're considering hiring a lawyer to discuss your options. He keeps telling you you can retire on disability. That's more than a smoking gun. If only you could get it in writing or rely on any witnesses that heard him tell you that. If he only said it in private, it's he said she said. If that doesn't fly, he discriminated against you due to your age. He can hire a young teacher cheaper than you. That evaluation was a piece of shit. You know it and he knows it. They came up with that as an excuse to fire you because you're expensive.
Re: Jay is a shit.
Date: 2011-06-28 05:25 am (UTC)Do you have any friends that are lawyers you can talk to for free?
Being a para is a good idea. You just have to work somewhere in the state, right? Well, ROC isn't the only school and Triton isn't the only district. Apply as a teacher and apply as a para everywhere. You're right. They can get a 30 year veteran teacher for the price of a para. NETWORK! Call all of your teacher friends and acquaintances you've ever met or had contact with and tell them your situation. You've lost your job and you need 2 years and 37 days to get the retirement you've earned. Unemployment might be able to help you there too. Some of them keep a look out for jobs.
OH! And there is a school board meeting? Is there any law that says YOU can't speak at the board meeting? They usually have public comment. Don't rely on Jay. I'll bet he doesn't even tell them anything, then he lies to you and tells you they voted no. Go to the meeting. Tell them point blank you were RIFd. You're 2 years and 37 days away from the retirement you earned. You are willing to work in any capacity including substitute and PARA at any school in the district. Beg them to find you work anywhere. It could work. And it will embarrass the hell out of Jay. You don't owe him anything so let him reap what he sowed. He thinks you'll go quietly and no one will know how he's treated you. Don't let him get away with that.
If you can find the board meetings for other districts around you, do the same thing. Submit applications and resumés everywhere. You'll have to for unemployment anyway because you have to be "actively seeking employment". Yes, it's a bitch. But do it in person. Ask for an appointment with the head of human resources and present yourself as if it's an interview. If you have any portfolio material, copies of student work, your own writing, etc. bring that.
Re: Jay is a shit.
Date: 2011-06-28 05:25 am (UTC)You're too polite. If you ever see Jay again and he makes his fucking excuses tell him point blank he is a lying asshole that made promises that were full of shit. At that point you can tell him about how insulting it was to be treated like garbage to be tossed aside with NO acknowledgement at graduation and not so much as a fucking card. He is a fucking piece of shit.
If you had stayed at Triton you would still be teaching and you'd be able to do those 2 years and 37 days and get your full retirement. (Has Brett retired yet? Can you go back to Triton? It's only 2 years and 37 days.) It's JAY'S FAULT that you're not getting your retirement. Not only for HIS decision but for HOW that decision was carried out. He's the reason nothing was said at graduation and there was no farewell, no card, nothing. I'll bet he didn't tell anyone. YOU NEED TO TELL. Tell all of your fellow teachers you're looking for work and on the sub list. You need your 2 years and 37 days. If they hear of anything please call you, please recommend you. See if you can get letters of recommendation from all of your colleagues. And tell ALL of your students you'll tutor because you need the money now that you are UNEMPLOYED. They need to know you won't be at ROC in the fall. Let them put the pressure on Jay. (Well, that should have happened the minute you heard as it's too late now, but it wouldn't hurt.)
You need to get the word out to everyone.
You can do this. You can get that 2 years and 37 days. It will take some work but you can do this. And fuck Jay and the horse he rode in on.
Ah. I feel much better now. Can you tell I 'm simply livid about this? Thanks. I needed a good rant.
The good, the bad, and the ugly
Date: 2011-06-29 09:17 am (UTC)As much as I truly understand how betrayed you feel about Jay, I'm not sure targeting him with your anger will be productive for you. We all tend to ruminate on our disappointments for too long. I think it is misguided to dwell on him at all.
I was betrayed, in a similar way, in 2002 by my supervisors. After a humiliating experience at work, and a temporary absence, I returned to work, restored . . . but the hostility I felt afterwards made the environment (I was a supervisor) intolerable, so I resigned and moved on. Life got better.
Jay is likely towing the line for upper management directives. He may not show it but I'll guarantee he is deeply conflicted. And he is replaceable, too. His time will come.
I agree with the advice of your friend, "the_godiva." Focus on finishing off your career the way you choose. You are a strong woman, who I respect and appreciate, and I know you can do it. But the last rounds in the ring will be a fight that'll tax your energies to the limit, and that can get ugly for you, if you falter or fall to the floor (watch out for the knock out punch, dear one). You'll have to weigh the cost of it to you, emotionally.
Either way, you're not a failure. You were and are an excellent teacher and nobody can take that away from you. Your kids were lucky to have you for as long as they did.
Respectfully,
Pappy