Dreaming of "Tent Revivals"

THIS is an entry I wrote about a week ago, but my computer froze, and I thought I had lost it.  When I signed in today, lo and behold, the LJ system had saved it as a draft.  

It's kind of Ironic that both of the things I put up today are of a religious nature--but one is nice and the other (this one) is disturbing.


I am feeling a quite a bit less fucked up.

Which is a good thing.

I had a very weird dream on Thursday night that was sort of intriguing and sort of disturbing.  I can't remember much of it now, since I waited too long to write it down--but I'll share what I can remember.

I dreamt I was at a hotel--a pretty fancy one, except for the fact that the rooms were all open--it was like the beds and things were right out in the hallways.  But it was very elegant.  I was there for a seminar of some sort.  I was with my mother, and I wasn't very fired up about the seminar because it was some bible-thumping evangelist.

Anyhow, I did not want to go to the meeting, but I felt like I had to.  

It was held in a huge auditorium--a big stage up front with microphones and stands with flowers, and a barrel chested guy in a suit strutting around on stage with greasy slicked back hair talking about JEE SUS.  People in the audience had that glassy-eyed fanatical look to them.

I instantly thought, "Fuck this," and decided to get out of there.

Suddenly, a little girl approached me and said something like, "Hello, Sara."

I said something to her, but I don't remember what.  Then she told me that God had told her my name.

"He did, huh?" I replied.  "That's interesting.  I always thought God was infallible--yet he can't even remember my name?"

Then the little girl kissed me right on the mouth.  

I was horrified and disgusted by it.  I don't know why.  It felt as gross to me as the idea of licking a maggoty dead cat.  She twined her skinny little arms around my neck and started kissing my whole face--wet kisses.  I was trying to pull her off, and she said, "You're so sweet, I could just kiss you all day."

She was like a leech.  I couldn't pry her off me.

Somehow I escaped and was in the parking lot looking for my car.  Of course, I can never find my car in my dreams.  It's never where I put it.

All the while, I was thinking about how repugnant that whole scene was to me, and feeling guilty too--since I felt like I was rejecting God.  But I wasn't rejecting GOD--I was rejecting the freakish fanatics who were practically orgasmic with their weird  religious experience.

When I woke up, I was still repulsed and horrified.

I don't know what sort of deep psychological weirdness in my subconscious THAT was about....but....ewwww.

Now, this is worth watching.

I got this in email from one of my dolly collecting friends. 

It is very beautiful.  And I am amazed by the talent of this little girl.

http://tinyurl. com/yxewot