In trouble at school....

I survived the first week of school after Christmas vacation--and it went quite well until yesterday...well, yesterday went quite well until the end of the day.  Drew and Cody were standing just outside the door of my classroom talking to Jonah and someone else.  I don't remember who.  Anyhow, I was repeatedly yelling at them, "Guys, get into the room!"  "Guys!  In the room.  NOW."  Usually they come in after me asking them two or three times. 

Well, this time they just blew me off completely.  I must have asked them 20 times to come in the room.  I SHOULD have gone to the door and yelled at them and told them to get their asses into the room.  But, it was Friday--I was tired and burned out--I had other kids at my desk yakking at me.  I just continued to yap at them every so often to get into the room and they continued to blow me off.

Apparently there were bunches of kids in the halls.  Robin was gone, so her homeroom was likely on the prowl.  Cecelia was gone, but I  think she had a sub.  I think there was at least one other teacher gone.  According to Susan, Jesse and Ryan's kids were running up and down the hallway.  Anyhow, Jay came out, saw all these kids in the hallway, got pissed, and went room by room, yelling at kids and teachers both.

When he got to my room, he told my kids to get out of the hall.  Then he yelled, "I -will fucking write your homeroom teacher up if you can't keep your asses in the room!"

He went down the hall yelling pretty much the same thing into each homeroom. 

Then I scolded my kids.  I said, "Thanks a lot.  It isn't like I didn't ask you 87 times to get in the room.  Now *I* am in trouble because *YOU* couldn't keep YOUR asses in the room."

Shortly after the kids left, Jay came around saying, "Board room, five minutes," which basically means everyone is getting their ass chewed.

And that's exactly what happened.  Jay said that if we didn't have all our homeroom kids INSIDE our home room, with our doors SHUT, he'd write us up.

Now, I don't really give a shit about being written up.  What does it mean, really?  that there will be a note in my personnel file saying that my kids were in the hallway during homeroom?  Not an issue, really.

BUT--i adore Jay--I worship the ground he walks on, truly.  he is a gift to education, a gift to those kids, and a gift to me.  To have been a disappointment to him KILLS ME.  kills me.

I was so emotionally saddened by it, that I had to go sit in the faculty bathroom for about ten minutes until I was sure I wasn't going to start bawling like a fucking baby.

I forced myself to eat a hot dog when i got home from school so I could take my meds, then I went to bed.  At 5:30.  And I spent most of today in bed too.  i just didn't have the will to get up until about 1 pm. 

Ah, life.

what kills me the MOST is that IF THOSE DANGED KIDS HAD LISTENED TO ME, I would not have been in trouble at all, and neither would they.  but NOOOOOO.  Sigh.

I know they were just kids being kids.  But they need to learn to THINK.  They could All have stepped into my room and continued to talk.  The others might have been in trouble for leaving their own homeroom, but not as much as they wouldn't have been out in the hallway where NO ONE is supposed to be during homeroom.